Can Your Engagement Ring Be Your Wedding Ring?

Modern western couples have total freedom of deciding what their ceremony will be like and whether they want to exchange wedding bands.

Some couples are limited in the budget; in other cases, the bride doesn’t want to replace her engagement ring with a different one but doesn’t want to wear two at once.

The answer to the “two or one wedding ring” question depends on the bride’s style preferences, attitude to traditions, religion, and other factors.

Do You Need Two Rings?

Nowadays, most women have two rings – the engagement ring and the wedding band. However, there is no official rule stating that you need two rings – you can only have one if you wish to.

Two rings are a traditional choice, but history shows that the tradition is relatively recent.

Furthermore, many brides choose to break the custom by stacking three rings or not wearing their rings at all, so only having one is perfectly fine.

If you decide to use your engagement ring as a wedding ring, you will need to take it off before the ceremony. The ring bearer will bring your engagement (now wedding) ring and the groom’s ring down the aisle.

Afterward, you will exchange the rings as usual wedding bands. However, there can be variations – some brides decide not to take off their ring and only put on a wedding band on the groom’s finger.

The truth is, you can get married at a courthouse or church without wedding bands.

If your partner doesn’t plan to wear the wedding ring and you only want to have the engagement ring, you can wear yours to the ceremony and skip the exchange altogether.

In some cultures, engagement ring and wedding band rules are stricter, and only having one ring is the norm.

For instance, in Turkey, the bride wears her engagement ring on the right hand. During the wedding ceremony, the groom moves it to the left hand.

In Islam, women only wear the wedding band or don’t wear a ring at all because dating is seen as a sin.

Wearing an engagement ring isn’t unlawful, but most religious couples refrain from it because it indicates they were dating before marriage.

A Minute of History

I’ve briefly mentioned that the two-ring tradition is relatively recent. In ancient times, women only had one ring – the wedding band.

The difference between an engagement ring and a wedding band wasn’t always definite. Engagement, in general, wasn’t always a thing.

The history of wedding rings started in Ancient Egypt when pharaohs gifted rings to their lovers during the wedding ceremony to represent eternal love because the circular shape has no beginning and no end.

After Alexander the Great conquered Egypt, Greeks adopted the ring tradition. Later, when the Romans took over Greece, they also started gifting rings to their loved ones as a symbol of devotion.

Despite the profound symbolism of wedding rings in ancient times, the marriage ceremony was remarkably simple. After the proposal, all the woman had to do was give her present consent.

Sometimes, the bride expressed her consent verbally. In other cases, the man offered his loved one a ring, and if she accepted it, the couple was considered married.

Wedding ceremonies of that time didn’t require witnesses or clergymen.

The lack of witnesses often raised concerns about the wedding ceremony’s legitimacy because the couple could later deny that the acceptance had taken place.

For this reason, the Christian church established new rules regarding marriage and wedding ceremonies in the 12th century.

Marriage was now a holy sacrament, and a man couldn’t offer any ring to a woman unless he intended to marry her.

Another point to note is that a wedding in ancient and medieval times was seen merely as a business contract between two families rather than an act of love.

Women often had no choice because their parents would choose their spouses based on the family’s social status. In such cases, the bride’s consent was not required.

The groom placed a ring on the bride’s finger during the wedding ceremony as a sign of ownership.

Arranged marriages were widespread in Europe until the 18th century, mainly among upper social classes. Consequently, engagement rings were rare until the Late Modern Period.

The Origins of the Two Ring Tradition

Now, you may wonder – when did two wedding rings become a thing? In the Western world, the tradition began in 1477, when Archduke Maximilian of Austria proposed to his lover Mary of Burgundy with an engagement ring.

Later, in the 1500s, Shakespeare also referred to engagement rings and wedding bands as two separate items.

Sometimes, the bride’s father used to send a ring to the father of the groom showing the intent to marry off his daughter.

However, having two rings was still very rare. Upper classes often didn’t see sense in engagement rings because of arranged marriages, and lower classes couldn’t afford them.

By the 18th century, the arranged marriage tradition started to die out. During the Georgian Era, women often wore “keeper rings” to both sides of their wedding band to protect and accent it.

Engagement rings gradually started to appear on the stage, but they were still optional. World War ll was a turning point in the two-ring tradition.

Soldiers proposed to their loved ones with engagement rings as a promise to marry after they came back from the front. The rings rarely featured diamonds and precious metals due to the economic crisis.

At the same time, married men started to wear wedding bands as a reminder of their wives back home. There was a wedding boom when the war ended, following all the engagements happening prior to the deployment.

A diamond mining company De Beers then launched the famous “A Diamond Is Forever” campaign that has skyrocketed engagement ring popularity and turned them into a widespread tradition.

The bottom line is that having two rings only became customary in the 1950s. Previously, engagement rings were optional.

Benefits of Having One Ring

We’ve determined that having only one ring historically was a norm, and the two-ring tradition resulted from war and diamond mining company marketing. But what about the practical considerations?

Only having the engagement ring has more practical benefits than having two rings. The most apparent one is the reduced costs.

Weddings tend to be costly, and the couple can save a lot of money by refraining from the wedding ring.

The saved money can then be used towards the honeymoon or wedding party. Alternatively, the groom may splurge more on the engagement ring if the bride considers one large diamond better than a small diamond and a wedding band.

Furthermore, many women aren’t used to wearing fine jewelry daily. It takes time to get used to the engagement ring, and wearing two at the same time may feel too much.

One may argue that the bride doesn’t have to wear the engagement ring after the wedding, but why spend a fortune on a ring you won’t wear?

Engagement rings tend to be expensive, beautiful, and carry profound symbolic significance, so many women don’t want to replace theirs with a less exquisite wedding band.

And, if you want to wear the rings together, you have to match the ring designs. This isn’t at all simple unless you have a natural sense of style. Some engagement rings are so exquisite that any wedding band looks extra.

After all, two rings mean doubled stress. Losing the ring isn’t uncommon, and many women don’t want to worry about two rings when they can only worry about one.

Drawbacks of Having One Ring

The benefits of having only the engagement ring are obvious and mainly practical, but the drawbacks are merely based on emotions and are subjective.

Some women love jewelry. A diamond engagement ring is great, but why limit yourself if you can also afford a matching eternity band?

Although the custom of having two rings only became widespread in the 20th century, it’s the norm nowadays. If you value tradition, only having one ring may feel odd.

Even worse if you have a very traditional family who will ask questions regarding the lack of a wedding band.

In this case, remember that the choice is only yours, and consider educating them on the engagement ring and wedding band history.

The last consideration is solely practical. Engagement rings tend to be sophisticated, featuring relatively large gemstones. Many women take off theirs when cleaning the house, working, or doing sports (and that’s right).

If you want to always have something on your ring finger, regardless of the circumstances, you may consider getting a simple metal wedding band to wear in situations when you can’t wear the engagement ring.