Garter Toss Tradition Explained (And Its Origins)

Regardless of your attitude towards the custom, the garter toss has withstood the test of time – its history counts centuries.

Nowadays, the practice of getting under the bride’s wedding dress to take off the garter and toss it into the bachelors’ crowd is considered harmless fun. However, it used to carry deep symbolic significance back in the day.

Thankfully, couples considering the tradition awkward don’t have to participate in it and can choose among numerous garter toss alternatives.

History of The Tradition

Many American wedding traditions originate in Victorian-era England or even earlier.

The garter toss is one of such long-standing customs that remains popular to this day. However, the history of the garter toss tradition is pretty dark and doesn’t fit the modern narrative.

Back in the day, newlyweds were expected to consummate their marriage as soon as possible – often, immediately after the wedding reception.

The couple’s family members and friends would follow the couple up to their bedroom, wish them well, and wait near the door to ensure the deed had happened.

Of course, the guests didn’t simply listen to what was happening in the room – they needed a poof. That proof was usually the bride’s garter that the groom would pass to the waiting crowd after the deed was done.

Another possible origin of the tradition lies in an ancient superstition stating that touching the bride on her wedding day would bring luck. Guests would often try to rip off a piece of the bride’s clothing.

According to historians, the bride would often toss her garter, which at that time was used to hold stockings rather than for visual appeal, into the crowd as the easiest accessible piece of her attire.

This version is plausible yet not perfect because gather certainly wasn’t the easiest accessible piece of clothing – every woman knows that.

Imagine reaching under a long, layered skirt and untying the garter while running from a crowd trying to rip your dress. Tossing the veil or bouquet seems more logical.

Perhaps, the tradition of passing a garter to the waiting crowd as proof of a done deed evolved into the garter toss to keep the guests at bay, preventing them from following the couple to their bedroom.

Interestingly, there’s another old English wedding tradition involving stockings or garters. The guests would throw garters at the newlyweds, and if they landed on the bride’s and groom’s heads, the couple was thought to be lucky and fertile.

The garter toss custom preserved its popularity for over 400 years, with some tweaks for the era. For instance, brides in the 1920s would often use their garters to hold a flask (a great alternative to garter toss even for modern brides) during alcohol prohibition.

Later, in the 1980s, grooms would hang their catch on a car’s rear-view mirror after the wedding. Hopefully, they didn’t drive around with such interior décor for long.

Modern Garter Toss Tradition

The garter toss tradition history may seem bizarre nowadays. Thankfully, the modern garter toss meaning is significantly more harmless and fun.

These days, the groom takes the garter off the bride’s leg using his hands (or, sometimes, teeth) and throws it into a bachelor’s crowd. Whoever catches the garter is believed to be lucky and get married next.

In other words, the garter toss is a male counterpart to the bouquet toss tradition. Sometimes, a woman who catches the bouquet and a man who gets the garter share a dance afterward.

Alternatively, the man who catches the garter may put it on the leg of the woman who catches the bouquet, although this may get odd when the people aren’t acquainted or are related.

Although the garter toss symbolism changed to fit the era, the tradition’s popularity rapidly declined in the last decades. Many couples find the custom outdated and even barbaric.

After all, premarital sex isn’t as widely frowned upon as in the old days, and the newlyweds don’t have to inform everyone about their intimate relationship. Furthermore, getting under the bride’s skirt while her parents are watching is awkward.

The tradition also isn’t widespread among same-sex couples. Despite the controversy surrounding the custom, there’s nothing wrong with participating in the garter toss fun if you feel like it. It can be entertaining if everyone perceives it lightheartedly.

Garter Toss Etiquette & FAQ

The garter toss isn’t a formal tradition, so it doesn’t involve any strict rules. However, couples considering incorporating the garter toss into their wedding may wonder who buys the garter, on which leg to wear it, and how to pick one.

Historically, garters were used to keep stockings in place, so the bride wore them on both legs. But over time, garters turned from practical into a merely decorative element often worn only on one leg.

There’s no rule regarding which leg to wear the wedding garter on, so the bride can wear it how she finds more comfortable. Some brides opt for a two-piece garter set to sacrifice one for the toss and keep the second one as an heirloom.

Typically, the bride wears her garter above the knee. This way, it’s high enough not to slip down but low enough for the groom to take it off quickly. However, this also depends on the garter’s design and size.

The garter doesn’t have to go on the bride’s leg. The couple can skip the garter removal entirely and simply toss a new garter right out of the bag to the crowd. It’s a great way to reduce the awkwardness.

Another common question is – who removes the garter during garter toss? “The groom” may be an apparent answer, but the bride can take it off herself if the couple isn’t ready for such intimacy in front of guests.

As for who buys the wedding garter, you have options. Some brides buy the garter themselves; others get it as a gift from the bridesmaids for the bachelorette party or bridal shower.

How to Choose a Garter

If you decide to incorporate the garter toss tradition into your reception, you may wonder how to pick a wedding garter and how much it costs. First, determine if you want to get a garter explicitly for the toss or as a piece of your lingerie set.

If you don’t want to spend a fortune on a garter your partner will later toss into a crowd of his friends, pick an inexpensive option for $10-$20. It doesn’t have to be exceptionally stylish or suit your bridal attire.

Frankly, buying a garter explicitly for the toss is logical because the bride won’t wear it for the nuptial night or honeymoon anyway.

On the other hand, if you love how garters look and want to wear one throughout the wedding day, you may spend a little extra.

At the end of the day, you don’t have to toss the garter. You can make a garter an element of your bridal lingerie set. Designer garters may cost over $100, but you can find beautiful options for about $40.

In this case, search for lingerie set with a garter to ensure every piece goes well together. Alternatively, pick a garter from the same fabric as your lingerie.

Garter Toss Alternatives

If you considered the garter toss custom controversial before, you certainly didn’t change your mind after reading about its history. There are numerous garter toss alternatives for couples wishing to bring the fun to the dancefloor but keep it appropriate.

One of the most creative garter toss alternatives is a themed toss. Substitute the garter for a small item that reflects your reception theme. For example, throw a stuffed flamingo if you have a tropical-themed wedding.

The main advantage of this alternative is that everyone can participate, regardless of gender and age. Another option is to toss the groom’s boutonniere to the bachelors, just like the bride’s bouquet to single ladies.

If you don’t mind the garter but wish to skip the removal and toss, hide the garter into an opaque balloon. Then, release several balloons on the dancefloor and ask every bachelor to pop one.

Whoever pops a balloon with the garter inside may be the groom at the next wedding party. Alternatively, put a note with a kind wish into each balloon so that no one is left out.

Another option is to skip the tossing and pass on the garter to the groom’s best man or an engaged friend as a blessing. Or, the bride may pass the garter on to her close friend who’s planning to get married soon.

Many couples replace the garter toss and bouquet toss traditions with fun games for all guests, like limbo stick dance or musical chairs. The game’s winner may get the bouquet, garter, a wedding theme item, gift card, or applauds.

After all, you don’t have to incorporate any activities into our reception. Great food, dancing, and social interactions are usually sufficient to make a wedding a day to remember.