Bridilly

How To Make The Perfect Maid Of Honor Speech

Updated October 12, 2024
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Being the maid of honor is a great privilege, but writing the maid of honor speech is just as great of a responsibility.

Before you get nervous, remember – your friend has chosen you because she believes you can rock that speech.

And you surely can, with enough thought put into it, dedication, practice, and confidence.

Write down the most notable traits of the bride and groom and the best moments you’ve experienced together.

Now, exclude any stories revolving merely around you, embarrassing moments, inside jokes, mentions of exes, and other inappropriate bits. Sprinkle your speech with humor and sincerity.

This may seem hard at first, but you totally can write a flawless maid of honor speech if you stay true to yourself and spend enough time on practice.

Consider the Audience

Always keep in mind your audience when writing your speech. Remember that you will be talking in front of not solely your friends but also the couple’s parents, grandparents, possibly children, and people you don’t know.

This is necessary for two reasons. Firstly, it will ensure your speech remains appropriate for the occasion. Secondly, it will help to avoid anecdotes certain people don’t have to know about.

For instance, you don’t have to talk about your wild partying with the bride in the good old days in front of her parents. It’s also best to avoid any mentions of exes, embarrassing stories, or overly intimate moments.

Your objective is to tell the best about the couple and congratulate them, not write a standup.

Even if you find a story about the bride hilarious but it may embarrass her, the groom, or anyone else, it’s not the best story for your speech.

Pick Your Style

Choose your speech style and follow it closely. There’s no specific rule stating what the maid of honor speech should be like. It can be short and funny or, on the opposite, long and romantic, but most importantly, consistent.

Your entire speech can consist of jokes, especially if your friendship with the bride is based on humor. But that’s a quite risky path, as the jokes must be funny for everyone in the audience and appropriate.

If you’re going for a sincere, formal maid of honor speech, strive not to go overboard. Some may find it awkward or boring.

Don’t talk for too long and avoid unnecessary details of your friendship story or the couple’s relationship.

A popular maid of honor speech style is anecdotal. Think of a story that perfectly describes the bride and groom’s relationship and involves you personally.

Avoid Cliches & Generalizations

Strive to make your maid of honor speech unique and avoid generic phrases such as “she’s such a great friend!” or “they love each other so much” unless they’re incorporated into a more meaningful sentence.

There’s nothing wrong with saying the bride is a great friend or that the couple loves each other, of course.

But the maid of honor speech usually isn’t that long, and you will likely want to dedicate more time to something not as obvious.

Think of what makes the bride, her relationship with the groom and you, and their wedding day truly special.

Maybe she has a fantastic sense of humor and never fails to brighten up your day, or always has an answer to any question.

In other words, try to be a bit more specific. You surely can explain why exactly you find the bride a good friend and why the couple is the perfect match for each other.

Don’t be afraid to get creative if you think the couple would appreciate it.

Some creative maid of honor speech ideas are including comments from friends and family, a slide show of the couple’s pictures, or interactive Q & A.

It’s Not About You

Typically, the maid of honor speech starts with a brief explanation of who you are to the couple. Next, you can include an appropriate story, for example, about your friendship with the bride or how you first met the groom.

However, keep in mind that this speech isn’t about you or your friendship. Don’t forget about the reason all the people in the audience gathered in one venue. Thus, keep any anecdotes involving yourself to a minimum.

The largest part of your speech should be dedicated to expressing gratitude to the couple, their parents, or anyone else you consider important for their wedding, the wishes, and stories about the bride and groom as a couple.

While you’re undoubtedly important to the couple if they chose you as the maid of honor, you aren’t the focal point of the speech.

You’re a person reliable for explaining to the audience why the bride and groom are meant for each other.

Don’t Neglect the Groom

Neglecting the groom is one of the top mistakes in the maid of honor speech. Often, the maid of honor becomes a close friend to both the bride and the groom – that’s the perfect case.

But even if you aren’t particularly close with the groom or even don’t like him at all, remember that it’s just as much his special day as it is the bride’s. His parents and friends will all be sitting in the audience.

Your goal is to express solidarity with the bride’s choice, so you should keep a happy face on even if you don’t really feel like it.

Strive to include a story related to the groom. If you don’t have a lot of stories together, the safe way is to mention how you first met or an important moment in the couple’s relationship you’ve witnessed.

You don’t have to talk about the groom personally if you don’t know him well, but more about him in relation to the bride.

Avoid Inside Jokes

Sprinkling your maid of honor speech with humor is great, but the humor should be comprehensible for everyone in the audience.

Thus, refrain from inside jokes that not even the groom would understand. This can be seen as unfunny in the best-case scenario and rude in the worst case.

In case you’re unfamiliar with the concept of an inside joke, it’s any joke that has context behind it necessary to get the humor.

So, if guests would have to be present with you to understand the joke, it isn’t the right choice for your speech.

Furthermore, inside jokes are commonly embarrassing for the bride. Even if she laughs at that time she blacked out in Vegas together with you, she likely doesn’t want you to mention it at her wedding.

Keep It Short

The average length of a maid of honor speech is two minutes. Some maids of honor opt for five-minute speeches; that’s the absolute maximum duration. The truth is, five minutes is a much longer time than it seems.

One may think that the longer is the speech, the more interesting moments you can include. But in reality, there are likely far fewer moments interesting for everyone in the audience and not just the two of you.

As a rule of thumb, the longer is your speech, the higher the chance of losing the audience’s attention.

Especially if your speech consists mostly of heartfelt wishes and blessings. It’s great to get sincere, but don’t make it awkward.

On the other hand, an overly short maid of honor speech that consists of one or two sentences may be seen as lazy and too informal.

The length of maid of honor speech also depends on your talking pace. Even if the speech text is long, you don’t have to rattle. Talk at your normal pace to ensure the words are distinguishable.

But don’t talk too slowly either – after all, a wedding is a happy occasion, and your speech should be lively.

Great Ending

Your maid of honor speech ending is more important than its start. Don’t crumble the ending and don’t end the speech on a negative note (it’s best not to include anything negative at all, but especially in the end).

Everything you say in the speech should lead to one a logical conclusion. For instance, don’t just tell an anecdote and stop at it without explaining why you’ve mentioned it.

The best ending of a maid of honor speech is a joke or a toast. You can simply raise your glass as a suggestion for everyone to raise theirs, or include something along the lines of “Now, let’s congratulate the newlyweds!”.

Practice, Practice, Practice

Practice is key to a successful maid of honor speech. Writing it is one thing; reading it out loud is entirely different. Some things that seem great on paper may sound awkward in life, and on the opposite.

The way you talk also matters. You shouldn’t be shy and quiet; your speech should be clear, loud, and confident.

If possible, practice in front of someone rather than alone. This is helpful for two reasons. Firstly, you will get used to people looking at you while you’re talking.

Secondly, people in the audience can suggest to you which parts of your speech sound great and which don’t. Getting a second opinion is never excessive.

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